Helping Kids Push Through the “I Can’t” Moments
Every child hits that wall. The one where the words “I can’t” come out before they even try. As adults, we know what that feels like — the frustration, the fear of failing, the instant urge to give up. But building resilience in kids means helping them face those moments, not avoid them.
It’s one of the most powerful lessons they’ll ever learn.
The small wins that build strong minds
Resilience doesn’t happen in one big moment. It’s built in dozens of small ones. When a child keeps pedaling after a fall, tries again after missing the goal, or takes a deep breath instead of walking away — that’s where growth happens.
Building resilience in kids starts by letting them experience effort without rescue. When we jump in too soon, they don’t get the chance to see what they’re capable of. Support them, yes. But let them struggle a little. That’s where confidence grows.
The role of sport and play
Sport is a safe place to fail. It gives kids a controlled environment to face challenges, make mistakes, and keep going. When they lose a match or miss a shot, they learn to recover. They see that one bad game doesn’t define them.
Through movement, we’re not just strengthening bodies. We’re shaping mindset. Building resilience in kids often starts on the field — with teamwork, persistence, and the courage to try again.
Letting go of perfection
Kids feel pressure. They see it in school, on screens, even from parents who mean well. When they think success means doing everything right, “I can’t” becomes easier to say.
Remind them that effort counts more than perfection. Celebrate progress, not just outcomes. Teach them that mistakes are part of learning. The best thing about building resilience in kids is that it doesn’t depend on being the best — it depends on showing up, again and again.
Model what you want them to learn
Kids mirror what they see. If they watch adults handle frustration with patience, they’ll do the same. Talk openly about your own struggles and what you do to stay motivated.
Show them that setbacks are temporary. Let them see you try, fail, and try again. It’s not about being perfect in front of them — it’s about being human. That’s the foundation of building resilience in kids.
Final thoughts
When a child says, “I can’t,” what they really mean is, “I’m scared I’ll fail.” That’s your cue to remind them that failure isn’t the end. It’s the beginning of growth.
Keep encouraging. Keep cheering. Keep reminding them they can. Because building resilience in kids isn’t about toughness — it’s about teaching them to believe in themselves, no matter what comes next.
Please note that any advice shared here is general in nature, and we recommend checking in with a professional in regard to your child’s needs.
For more tips and tricks on topics like this deep dive, feel free to contact us or refer to our Dewey Does blog.
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Hi, Team Does. I get all my sports news and updates from my friend Tommy Ommy, host of Straight from the Basement Sports Podcast. Be sure to follow him wherever you get your podcasts, and check out his YouTube channel for sports news and conversations - Dewey.
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